Honestly, I’ve been struggling to write this blog post for almost a month now. I want it to be perfect and speak to you in such a way that maybe you’d think this was written specifically for you. Girlfriend, I don’t know what you’re holding onto in this moment, but maybe we need to just take a deep breath together.
Performance anxiety and imposter syndrome are two things I struggle with on the daily. Looking back, I see that God has been with me in all of my painful moments. The good news about God is He hasn’t just been with me in the valleys, but the hills too. Not to turn this into a Tauren Wells song… I want you to imagine what it’s like to fall in love. Maybe you haven’t had a boyfriend yet or maybe you’ve been married for fifty years. Either way, I’m sure you have an idea of what it’s like. If you’re still reading, I’m going to make the assumption that you love Jesus, or at least know of Him. Hopefully, you believe that we are saved by His grace alone through our faith, not by works (Ephesians 2:8-9). You also know that faith without works is dead (James 2:26). This is an idea that can honestly be kind of confusing. I want to try to simplify it for you because I think we like to complicate the Gospel. One of my favorite stories in the Bible is four short verses out of Luke 10 where Jesus has an interaction with Martha and Mary. In case you need a refresher, Martha was doing all of these works for Jesus and Mary was sitting in His presence. The way I am used to hearing this story goes hand in hand with the phrase “don’t be a Martha” because people often read into it as though she was not doing a good thing. The thing about Martha is she is someone I can relate to really well. Martha was doing what was right in the eyes of the religious community at the time, serving others, whereas Mary was not. Martha was doing these things for Jesus and I think it was probably because she felt she had to earn His love. Mary was sitting at the feet of Jesus because she was in awe of Him. Remember when I had you imagine yourself falling in love? What’s at the beginning of that? Are you rushing around trying to do things for someone you don’t really know yet? Or are you simply spending time with him? Something else God has taught me over this past year is that all of my other relationships will reflect the one I have with His Son. You see, there is nothing wrong with doing good works for Jesus, but there is something to be said about the motivation behind them. So often we can get caught up in what others think of us or if we’re performing our faith the “right” way. We know that God is good, so we assume we have to do good to be like Jesus. While that’s not wrong, it’s also not correct. The good thing is not always the God thing. Martha was doing what was good by her standards, but Mary was doing what was good by God’s. Yes, we are called to live a life of service and love our neighbor. But we are first called to love our God. How can we possibly love others and do good if we do not spend time in awe of the One who IS fully good and defines love? I wonder if Martha felt like a bit of an imposter, wondering why she wasn’t getting praise from Jesus for doing what was good? I know I’ve felt like that… Wondering why someone else seemed to be getting what I wanted? Martha wanted attention from Jesus and Mary wanted to give her attention to Him. One of my favorite things about Jesus is that He is FULLY devoted to giving us His attention. You know that famous saying, He leaves the ninety nine? It’s true! But a relationship isn’t one sided. When you fall in love, it’s a two way street. You don’t spend time with one another out of guilt or shame, but out of joy and peace! The same goes for our relationship with Jesus. When we spend time in His presence, simply falling deeper in love with Him, we are then better equipped in properly loving our neighbor.
We can’t pour from empty cups.
You see, the good thing isn’t always the God thing, but God is always good. He draws us in, like Mary, so He can send us out, like Martha. What good is it if I am in love with someone, but no one knows? What good is it if I am performing for those I love? But God, who is FULLY in love with you wants to draw you in to send you out. He doesn’t need you to act like you have it all together. You don’t need to perform for God. His love is not transactional, but TRANSFORMATIONAL! Jesus didn’t tell Martha what she was doing was wrong, He simply said He is better. God doesn’t want you to be perfect! God wants you to love Him! The next time you find yourself wondering about the good thing, make sure it’s a God thing too.
Why is it important for you to spend time with Jesus? Do you notice a difference when you versus when you don’t?
What are you holding onto that’s getting in the way of your relationship with Jesus?
How can you start to believe that you don’t have to perform for God’s love?
What would it look like for you to love God more so you could love your neighbor more?
How is God currently working in your life and what things can you thank God for right now?
God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. Ephesians 2:8-9 NLT For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead. James 2:26 CSB As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.” But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42 NLT
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